Year In Review

I know that time is an arbitrary measurement created forever ago by some dude watching a swinging lamp in a church, and that our calendar was invented by someone named Gregory back in Sparticus times, but the end of the year always tangibly feels like the end of the year. At least to me. Maybe it's the menage a trios of Christmas, my birthday, and New Year's Eve that does it, but the final month of the year weighs heavily on me.

Not that I don't enjoy the holidays, I really do. It's a fun time of year, what with all the merriment and family time and gift giving (not to mention getting), the holiday parties, and the over-eating. All good things.

At the time of this writing I'm 28 years and 1 day old. I woke up early, made some coffee and a bowl of cereal, dressed up, and had a half day of work. Jonas hung out with his grandma for a few hours while Kasey, her brother Daniel, our friend Kat, and I all went out for sushi. Really, it's all we had time for.

This year has been a mixed bag of extremes. Occupying both ends of the spectrum, there's Jonas. He's grown into such a brilliant little man with so much personality. He gets prettier, smarter, and funnier every day. But he can also be the most aggravating force in the world. Sometimes you just want to pay attention to a movie, or a book, or anything for longer than five minutes, but mostly that just can't happen while he's awake. Going anywhere takes three times as much preparation, and staying out late is almost an impossibility. And I have never been as angry at anything as I have been at Jonas. But then, three minutes later, he'll do something tiny and hyper-adorable and all is forgotten and forgiven. If I was the kind of guy to categorize, Jonas would be placed squarely in the Best Thing Ever category.

My work situation started out as non-existent, moved to accidental employment in promotions, and then I got lucky. A company called Truestone called me up for an interview, and even though I ran out of gas on my way there and had to reschedule for the next day, they hired me. In terms of lucky breaks that happened this year, that one was probably the biggest. I love this company and my job; something that hasn't happened since I left Arizona. I'm the IT support guy for (as of just recently) two offices and over ninety people. Everyone is laid back, my boss is awesome, and there's this whole environment of mutual appreciation going on. When my boss couldn't give me a raise because of corporate policy, he wrangled me a bonus to make up for it. This job is definitely a keeper.

In contrast, my personal life has been... a challenge. It seems unless people are willing to come over to our place, we don't hang out with anyone. Most of my social interaction happens electronically. I know it's not true, and despite what Facebook says, it feels like I have no friends. Every week I start looking forward to the weekend, but when it finally arrives I'm more stressed and upset than I am during the weekdays. I could ask for help, or a break, or whatever, but I know everyone else is exhausted as well, and besides, if I have to ask that means no one really wants to do it.

I have gotten back into reading this year, and I wrote a bunch. I even got a short article published in a real newspaper, which was pretty damn awesome and surprising. We started teaching Jonas American Sign Language (which is probably the best parenting decision we've made so far), and after a couple books and a bunch of online studying all three of us have the beginnings of a decent sign language vocabulary. Including cusses.

Habitually I started to make a list of New Year's resolutions, but I'm so exhausted physically, mentally, spiritually, grammatically, that my heart wouldn't be in it. I would like to write for like an hour daily, and losing some weight would be awesome. I have this goal to start dressing snappier (think Joseph Gordon-Levitt in 500 Days of Summer, or Lee Pace in Pushing Daisies), but I need to lose this pooch before I can really pull it off.

Be safe out there tonight, and all the nights of 2011. Here's to the sweet and the sour, and many more new years after this one.

David

Location:Court St,Portsmouth,United States

Jailatin

Most everybody knows I'm a vegetarian.  I'm inevitably outed to any new acquaintance, because Americans love to eat and food comes up in conversation a lot more than you'd think.  I hold off on revealing my abstinence from meat for as long as possible because, quite frankly, I'm sick of answering the same set of questions as to the whys and wherefores.  Everyone asks, but no one cares about the answers.  I don't know what they're expecting, but what I tell them apparently isn't it.  Maybe they're looking for some kind of an argument, like I have a PETA membership card stashed in my wallet and have an energetic albeit misguided tirade all lined up for them.

After we get to know each other awhile they'll start to make jokes about eating meat, which I really don't mind.  "Hey David, want to go get some ribs? Harhar!"  "He don't eat meat but he sure likes to bone!"  "VEGetarian or VAGetarian, lols!"  Some guys at work joke that they'll get me eating meat by the end of the year, like I'm handicapped and they're going to impose a regime that will get me out of my wheelchair and jogging as long as I stick to it.

My favorite is when people seem offended that I'm vegetarian.  One co-worker gave me this look and shook his head as if he couldn't believe it, like I'd just said I collect Nazi memorabilia or only date middle schoolers.  It was as if my dietary choices were an affront to his system of beliefs.  To me this is like going to a bar to pick up chicks with a co-worker and being upset to learn that he's gay.  It just means more for you, buddy!

I don't know what it is lately, but meat products have been tempting, in the way that robbing a 7-11 is tempting.  It's because things have been really... trying lately, and when one is depressed strange things stop mattering.  Like the refusal to kill bugs.  I've been meat-free for about five years now and I know that eating meat at this point would cause my digestive system to fall out on the floor.  Through my ass.  I'd have to start very slowly, with beef broth or something and work my way up.  But when I think about it, all I see is a long line of stomach aches and time spent in the bathroom for purposes other than reading, and suddenly KFC loses it's appeal.  (That is, until I smell fried chicken again.  Mmm-mm!)

Sad to say, I have cheated a bit.  I knowingly ate marshmallows on a couple of occasions.  (Marshmallows are mostly gelatin, which is connective tissue and leftovers from slaughter houses.  Yum, right!)  They were pretty good, but not like, "OMG I have missed these and now have 'mallow wood!" kinda good.  Just so so, and there were some digestive repercussions.  This week I took a bigger step over the line and ate two full strawberry Pop-tarts.  From the toaster and everything.  They were mildly delicious, but I think mostly I was tasting nostalgia.  And then came the pain.

Excuse my frankness, but I have been stopped up all week, and it sucks.  Sucks sucks sucks.  On the positive side, it is good to know that I was right about getting sick and haven't been hiding behind a false belief all this time.  On the negative side, it now feels like I HAVE to be vegetarian, and that just isn't as much fun.  I've passed the point of no return and even if I wanted to go back (which I don't really) it would be more of a pain than it would be worth.

At least I have Morningstar Farms, though.  And pretension.

 - David